romeo, save me; i've been feeling so alone.

jfsdaoiuhuetihuisgdusd!

no words to describe how happy/excited/ecstatic i am!

i love you.

i love you.

i love you.

<3333

it doesn’t feel like christmas.

cause i don’t have you.

my christmas wish?

to look absolutely gorgeous, get the boy back, curl up in pajamas, drink hot cocoa, have a warm fire going, fall asleep watching a movie, know that he’s mine again.

that’s all.

oh, i had a lot to say, was thinking on my time away.

i missed you and things weren’t the same. cause everything inside, it never comes out right. and when i see you cry, it makes me wanna die. i’m sorry i’m bad, i’m sorry you’re blue. i’m sorry about all the things i said to you, and i know i can’t take it back. i love how you kiss, i love all your sounds, and baby, the way you make my world go ‘round. and i just wanted to say, i’m sorry. this time i think i’m to blame. it’s harder to get through the days. we get older and blame turns to shame. cause everything inside, it never comes out right. and when i see you cry, it makes me wanna die. i’m sorry i’m bad, i’m sorry you’re blue. i’m sorry about all the things i said to you, and i know i can’t take it back. i love how you kiss, i love all your sounds, and baby, the way you make my world go ‘round. and i just wanted to say, i’m sorry. every single day i think about how we came all this way. the sleepless nights and the tears you cried; it’s not too late to make it right. oh yeah. sorry. i’m sorry i’m bad, i’m sorry you’re blue. i’m sorry about all the things i said to you, and i know i can’t take it back. i love how you kiss, i love all your sounds, and baby, the way you make my world go ‘round. and i just wanted to say, i’m sorry. i’m sorry baby. i’m sorry baby. yeah, i’m sorry.

-sorry by buckcherry

1) it makes me laugh to think a song like this was written/sang by the same group that sang “hey, you’re a crazy bitch; but you fuck so good i’m on top of it.”
2) it’s like they can read my mind.

you’ve been so sweet lately. i wish you would just be with me. people wonder why i still put up with you and still try to give you my everything and still care. people wonder why i go through hell for you. people wonder why i think you’re worth it.

well, to put it simply; i love you. and yes, you make me cry more than anyone else ever has or ever will. but i forgive you, because you also make me smile and laugh more than anyone ever could. no one besides you will ever get that huge, crazy, annoying, silly, genuine laugh out of me that you do so effortlessly.

just come back, baby. 

let’s just stop, drop everything, forget each other’s names, and just walk away.

i’m so close to being done. you’ve been stringing me along for quite long enough i think, and honestly it’s not fair. especially since i think we both know who’s heart you’re going to be breaking in the end. it’s to the point where i have no faith, no hope, and i don’t even know if the feelings we had our real. how could they be if you’re willing to put me through this? well, mine are real. if they weren’t why would i be willing to be dragged through the mud, stabbed in the back, kicked repeatedly in the stomach, and have my heart shattered into tiny little pieces? i’m tired of caring. i’m tired of praying every night that you’ll realize what you should do. i’m tired of having to think “why is she so much better than me?” i’m tired of being second best. i’m tired of being walked all over. i’m tired of you thinking it’s okay to break my heart. i’m tired of hurting. i’m tired of crying. i’m tired of having panic attacks. i’m tired of literally clawing at my stomach to make sure i can still feel. because it’s to the point where i just feel numb. i still know it should hurt like a bitch, but i don’t feel anything anymore. i don’t even feel anything when you say i love you. maybe that’s because of the guard i have up. or maybe that’s because i don’t know if you really mean it anymore. you told you would give me an answer. that was four or five days ago. i can’t wait anymore. i need to know. i know what you’re going to say. why else would you be avoiding me the way you have. honestly i think picking her is taking the easy way out. honestly, i don’t know what to think anymore. i’m done. i hope she makes you happy.

i also should just listen to my mother.

“well hon, it seems like through everything; the ups, the downs, the fights, the tears, the laughter, the joy, the love, the disappointment, the pain, the hurt, the break ups, and the make ups, you’ve always known what you wanted. you wanted to stay by his side, work things out, be together, be committed to each other, and never leave each other. it seems like his mind always changes. when you two are good, he wants to be with you. when you two are bad, he wants out. when you two are happy, he loves you and you’re the one he wants. when you two are fighting, he’s not sure if you should be together. either he needs to decide he wants to be with you and that should be his constant feelings. or you should find someone that will have that same view as you. that no matter what happens, you want to be together.”

: (

love remembers the smell of a summer day.

lying in a hammock over fresh cut grass,
and the promise of forever.
love remembers the sound of the pouring rain,
beating down on the top of the car,
on the side of the road where it couldn’t wait.
yeah, love remembers.

i wish i could just forget you.
or lose the feelings i have.
or at least not be at your beck and call.
but i can’t seem to walk away from you.
even though i’m throwing myself at you.
and you’re still not just taking the risk.
you’re still chasing after her.
even though we both know i’m what you want.
or maybe that’s all talk, i’m not really sure.
but i wish you’d just pick.
and if it’s not me then let me go.
but if it is then hurry up and let me know.
cause i’m about to walk away.

when you look me in the eyes, and tell me that you love me..

every thing’s alright, when you’re right here by my side.
when you look me in the eyes, i catch a glimpse of heaven.
i find my paradise, when you look me in the eyes.
how long will i be waiting, to be with you again?
gonna tell you that i love you in the best way that i can.
i can’t take a day without you here,
you’re the light that makes my darkness disappear.

i love so much to hear that you miss me and want to be with me and you still love me and you still want to marry me and you think we’re meant to be and you know we’ll find a way to make this work. but i hope you realize it doesn’t mean shit since you’re still chasing after her. it doesn’t mean anything since you’re trying to work things out with her instead of working them out with me. you’re pursuing her when i should be the one you’re chasing. who makes you happier, her or me? if you could pick one person to be with and have things work, who would it be, her or me? who do you see yourself with, her or me? who do you like more, her or me? who do you want, her or me? i miss you a lot. i just don’t get why we don’t just try now.

whatever.
i hope you know i’m hoping you guys fail.
sorry, i’m a bitch.
but love makes people crazy.